Painting My Way Through The Pandemic

It has taken me nine months to finally feel like moving back toward sharing my art on Etsy again. My heart has needed time to heal.

The Coronavirus Pandemic hit about the time that my Mom declined rapidly and passed away last spring... and so began a bizarre, heartbreaking "saying goodbye" without the chance to be with her in her last days, or even attend her funeral due to travel restrictions. It was an emotional and baffling time for me, trying to make sense of the circumstances of Mom's homecoming. For a while, it just didn't seem like it all could be real.

So... I really needed to step back for a while to think, to pray, to wrestle with what was and with what is now. I needed a safe place to just be for a while.

Being quarantined at home during this time ended up being a gift to me... I didn't have anywhere to go, there weren't many outside distractions or responsibilities, and life was extra quiet at our house. So, I dug into my craft closet and found some tiny canvas panels I'd been hoarding forever, and started to paint them one by one.

I've always enjoyed working small... My first endeavor with online art sales was creating ACEO's (artist trading cards that are for sale... They measure 2.5" x 3.5"). I like the challenge of creating in a defined space. I like to see how many different ideas can be created on a tiny art card... or in this case, a miniature canvas.

And so, I spent the summer and fall applying colorful acrylics to tiny canvases. The ideas just kept flowing...

...until finally I'd created quite a stash of mini paintings!

I resisted the idea of reopening my Etsy shop at first... Was I ready to come out of my retreat yet? Did I have the emotional and physical energy to re-engage with the world? And, was I willing to go back to posting on Instagram and Facebook again so people could find out about my art?

Well, to tell the truth, the jury's still out on the social media question. I have really loved the quiet... not feeling obligated to post, not being bombarded with what everyone else if doing and thinking... just being me with my own creative ideas and thoughts.

But I did miss putting my artwork out into the world and sharing what I'd created. It seemed a waste to keep stashing my paintings where no one would ever enjoy them.

So, I'm back. And it feels OK. I'm not expecting hoards of customers knocking at my shop's door. But I do hope that others will find a tiny bit of happiness from what I have made. If I can add to someone's joy by sharing my art, that will be more than enough! 

 

Thank you Lord for time to heal. Thank you for the joy of creativity. Thank you for new beginnings. Thank you for loving me! 💖

Light In My Darkness

 

It has been a very long time since I've written in my blog... over two years, in fact. Life has been filled with family illness and the homecoming of my sweet Dad. Now my Mom is declining rapidly. I'm trying my best to care for her well, while my heart is grieving. It is the circle of life... We are only given so many days on this earth, and then we return to the Lord, which is a blessing! But this ending of life!... It is so very very hard! I need God's grace to make it through each moment of every single day.

I've written before that I struggle with depression... and during this difficult time, it's been hard to find my way out of the darkness at times. My physician has changed my medications, and that has greatly helped me cope on this journey I've found myself on. I am truly grateful to be feeling so much better!

And painting has helped soothe my soul. I don't claim to be a terrific artist... but somehow in putting pencil to paper and then paint on canvas, peace and joy have come into my heart. This winter, as the afternoon sun has been shining in the windows of my studio, I've experienced a calm, quiet place of healing and comfort as I've painted and listened to soft, soothing music. My studio has felt like a sanctuary... and art making has felt like communion with God.

Thank you Lord, that you meet me right where I am... even when I'm in the darkness. You come to me and comfort me. You shine Your light on me and fill me with joy and gladness! I am so very grateful!!